Topics to Discuss Before Moving in Together

Topics to Discuss Before Moving in Together 

• Food Allergies: My mother has celiac disease and it's a huge deal for her to know whether or not a guy is okay with that in the dating world. It's best that you ask the guy/gal if they have any food allergies.

Worst Case Scenario: He's allergic to dairy and you're obsessed with dairy. That's a huge commitment. Are you ready for that?

• Pets/Animals: If you have a pet or your family does and they often ask you to pet sit... You'd want to make sure your partner (or even roommate) is cool with that. 

Worst Case Scenario: Your mom is retiring to Hawi'i and she's tired of taking care of your childhood dog Max who still has the energy of a puppy. Your roommate threatens to move out or your new beau/fiancé/husband ends up sleeping at his guy friend's house because he has trauma with animals.

• Smoking: If one of you is a smoker or both of you are smokers but one of you HATES your home or car to smell like an astray or cigar shop then this should definitely be up for discussion.

Worst Case Scenario: Your significant other is a chain smoker who can’t help it.

• Do you want to get married in the future?

That's the best way to ask!
PLEASE, Don't ask:

If we live together, do you want to get married? 
Translation: OMG! If we live together we can move on and stuff! OMG! I’m going to start a scrapbook with a chapter dedicated to $80,000 wedding dresses! 
And I'm not saying that for the other person it's for you! It means, you want to rush and unless you’re terminally ill with only a few years or months left to live… You kind of want to take your time before you make the ultimate decision.

And in case you do want to end up married to this person the best way to ask this question is:

What are your thoughts on marriage?

• Parties vs. Slumber Parties vs. 

Party Friends crashing at your house 

Yeah! That reckless  party friend who wants to sleep over because they were in the neighborhood and were too drunk to go home & ugghh... He didn't come alone!

Yep! The Party Friend. Oh that friend! Whether it's your friend or your partner's friend.... You kind of really want to discuss that. Cause the party friend is cool, you're pals and you've been there for each other blah blah blah! But! Think it through!  Do you really want someone calling you at 6am in the morning? Just to have sex on your couch that took you 2hrs to assemble! 😔


Parties, there will be times when you want to have a party at your newly couplet home... BUT what if he enjoyed the parties when he was fine with it when he lived with his roommate but prefers to be a "family-oriented" person at HOME. 


Slumber Parties:
Married couples have these when their friends are visiting from a different city or state or even half way across the world or just the country next door. Well you kind of want to make sure that's okay for the both of you.

Worst Case Secanrio #1: Your friend with no morals is harassing your significant other.


Worst Case Scenario #2: Someone ends up having sex on that 2hrs to assemble IKEA couch. 

• Income: How much do you make? Is the most embarrassing question you could ask someone on the first date! The economy is pretty bad, sure! The bills don't pay themselves, you've got that right! But asking someone how much they make isn't something you just ask... Especially since according to Dr. Sullivan a former professor of mine, men have self conscious of: money and...the size of their...Ahem! Pee! Ahem. Ness! Ahm! (Yes you can cough on the Internet)


Worst Case Scenario: He's a hit man or scammer or involved in human trafficking (call the Feds on that sociopath!) 

Worst Case Scenario #2: He's unemployed and doesn't want to be... Ever.  

• Minimalism vs. Hoarders vs. "Collectors"

Collectors are people who are minimalists but they collect a specific thing. For example, I am a dual-collector, meaning I like to collect family photos and place them in a chest passed down from my family when we've first arrived to America.

Hoarder is a very serious emotional issue, your mate might want to visit a life coach or therapist.... An organization specialist might help but that's actually considered a mental illness... Meaning there is a deeper meaning to why s/he is REALLY hoarding. 


Minimalist --- that's what my mom is! Growing up with a minimalist she's made me throw out.... "Everything". And if I didn't throw it out. She did it for me. It's pissed me off in the past but as an adult I appreciate it. I still wish I had my old Cassette/CD player  but... I guess I didn't need it that much. PS: My cousin took my Nintendo and I'm going to get that thing back! You've been warned! My Nintendo will be given back! 

• Religious Stuff...

If your significant other is a very religious person who has traditions that are performed on a scheduled daily basis or if they have five pictures of Baby Jesus and the Virgin Mary that they would like to place where ever possible but you're an atheist or you're Jewish or Wiccan... You should definitely discuss and compromise who gets to put what where and most of all if that's okay. This is can get touchy.

& finally, video games!

If your significant other spends 10 hours of their day at work and the other 10 hours playing video games and somehow manages to eat and sleep...... Yeah. You'd definitely want to discuss that. Compromise! Ask him/her if you can play too!

Did I miss anything?

What's your opinion?

What were the things you've discussed before moving in together?

Yours Truly,

Amela Sandra